


Cement, Cardboard, Tissue

by EnchantedToReadYou



Series: Wonderful Christmas Time. [5]
Category: Glee
Genre: Angst, Blangst, M/M, Mental Illness, mentions of drinking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-09
Updated: 2014-12-09
Packaged: 2018-02-28 19:49:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 664
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2744894
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EnchantedToReadYou/pseuds/EnchantedToReadYou
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>By morning Blaine is smiling, by noon Kurt hopes that he is at least alright and by evening Blaine’s face is one big frown.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cement, Cardboard, Tissue

Day 5: Evening

 

Mornings are usually the best. It’s the time of the day when Kurt can still feel like breathing beside Blaine is easy and like the day ahead of him has potential to be different. It’s when he wakes up in Blaine’s arms and disregards the last day because now, Blaine is close and his arms are around him to erase the former night. Their warmth makes him want to never leave the safety of their bed in the morning, because despite his hopes his fears are already on the forefront. He kisses Blaine and actually gets kissed back and it doesn’t matter that neither has brushed their teeth. ‘Morning, Kurt’ Blaine will say as soon as he opens his eyes and Kurt will replay with ‘Good Morning’ and then they get up. The breakfast is peaceful and Blaine is still happy. He smiles and laughs and if Kurt wouldn’t know better, he’d think that those emotions would stay that way. They talk carefreely because in the morning, Blaine is made out of cement. Like he too believes that this day will be different. Then, far too soon, Blaine will have to leave the house to go to college while Kurt leaves a bit later for his internship.

It’s usually noon when Kurt takes a break and gets on the phone to write Blaine. Sometimes it’s just ‘I love you’ or ‘Have a nice day’ but other times, when he is really worried he writes ‘Please call if you feel bad.’ or ‘How are you?’. Most of the time Blaine will answer with a lot of happy smilies and kissing lips but sometimes he will call and when Kurt picks up Blaine is very silent. It’s those times that Kurt talks about anything coming to his mind, even though his voice is shaking. Because those are the bad days on which he feels like Blaine is slipping through his fingers and eventually through his own. By midday, Blaine is made out of card board. Kurt can’t even fathom what Blaine thinks of when he is like this, he just knows that he then proceeds on hiding the medicine at home, as well as any alcohol that may be left over in places Blaine won’t look into. Nowadays, he has a ‘no alcohol in this house’ policy that his friends have to abide. It’s not like alcohol makes Blaine happier, it just makes him depressed and drunk. 

The evenings are the worst, because by then, Blaine is a piece of tissue.  
It always looks like all the energy from the morning has left Blaine and as soon as he steps over the threshold of their apartment, his face is one big frown. Sometimes Kurt wonders if Blaine would be less depressed if he didn’t come home to him. Then again, he knows how good Blaine is at acting like everything is alright in front of their friends, because Kurt has to handle the aftermath of such evenings. It’s like Blaine simply shuts off for a few hours, just sitting there staring at the cabinet that is now empty because Kurt knew better than to keep things in there any longer. When they go to bed Blaine would only have two default settings. One being dead quiet, even his body being still as he lies down without a kiss goodnight or the other where he would try to explain himself and always gets angry because ‘this isn’t working’ and ‘it’s not like you would ever understand’ and ‘when will it get better? ‘why me’ ‘I don’t deserve you’. Maybe Kurt never finds the right words because he feels like he used them all up by now. It’s all the same, every evening’s outcome is him feeling cold as the distance between them in the bed stretched impossibly wide.   
There is a reason Kurt has banned alcohol from their house. That just means their friends will always have one at hand when he needs it.


End file.
